Changing My Mind

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I posted this picture on Instagram this morning - A few scribbles from Phillipians 4:8 that inspired me and might be nice for someone else to look at. 

It's pretty, right? Nice words, some sunshine through the window and those peonies that make me inhale deeply. We've just begun a series at church on renewing our minds, addressing thoughts and purposefully changing how our brain is wired. The things we think about matter because they shape us. 

So I read my bible quietly, posted that glowy little picture, finished my coffee and left the house feeling like a boss. 

And then Monday hit.

And I really love my life and my job, but some days it flies at me hard. Two conversations and maybe a couple emails in, and my buttons were all pushed. It didn't take much really. I sat at my desk feeling small, insecure, overwhelmed. And my thoughts in that moment weren't honourable or right or pure or lovely. It is ridiculous, actually, how quickly I swung toward anger, hopelessness and the nagging tug of stress. 

There isn't an Instagram filter to doll up that kind of ugly. 

 

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At some point, staring at my computer screen, I realized how far I'd wandered in a few short hours. The Holy Spirit's good like that. I grabbed a bible, cracked it open to Phillippians, read it again. Yanked my mind back to where I want it to be. 

I'm so human. Embarrassingly fragile. Easily distracted. (My intentions are great, though.) On my own I'd have quit a long time ago. Thank GOD I'm not on my own, though. I'm posting this one because maybe one or two of you need to read this scripture through one more time, as I did. And do. And will again. And may the God of peace walk with you, as I desperately (obviously!) need him with me. 

Philippians 4:8-9 Finally, brothers and sisters, fill your minds with beauty and truth. Meditate on whatever is honorable, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is good, whatever is virtuous and praiseworthy. Keep to the script: whatever you learned and received and heard and saw in me—do it—and the God of peace will walk with you. 

PS. Those words I wrote out this morning - I'm keeping them close. Taped up next to the kitchen sink, where I rehearsed them while washing and drying tonight's dishes.